It is December 17, 2012. Just 4 days after the Sandy Hook tragic school shooting. I cannot get the visions of the children and adults killed out of my head. It makes me sick to my stomach to think about what these families must be going through. And I also cannot stop thinking of the "what ifs" in my own life. As I kissed the kids goodbye this morning getting out of the car, what if this is my last time seeing their precious face? What if this is the last time I will hear Kate say one of her adorable lines that put a smile on all of our faces? What if they don't get to open their Christmas presents? I know that we cannot live our lives this way but it has been hard not to these past couple days. And we are the lucky ones. This horrible thing did not happen in our town or school and I pray that it never does.
I look at the picture of the boy that did this horrific, unthinkable crime and I can tell right away that he is not emotionally connected or available. He appears to be a shell and I wonder how can we help these people and keep them from doing harm to others? It has been a few years since I called on mental health facilities with Pfizer but even then physicians and mental health workers were concerned that unstable people were free to roam society. Long gone were mental health institutions that could provide a safe place for people with mental illness. Funding was dwindling for programs to help. And then I start to also think about the rise of bullying among our kids and more kids being diagnosed with diseases that may or may not have violent tendencies. Will we see more of this in years to come? I pray not. Grace has asked thought questions like "were they shot in the heart?" and it is a fine line of wanting to tell them the truth but not telling too much. I have answered their questions but when she asked that I told her that I didn't know and there was some stuff she was better off not knowing. She agreed without hesitation. I also want them to enjoy these last few days before Christmas. One of our favorite times of the year as a family.
We have made christmas mix, done breakfast with Santa, went to the Dublin tree lighting, been to the zoo lights with Nana and cousins, uncle Scott and aunt Jenny. We will be heading to Michigan this weekend for several christmas gatherings and fun times with cousins. Kate is scared to death of Santa. She says he has "girl hair" and has had a death grip on me anytime we come within 30 feet of him. She does however like Mrs. Claus. She said she doesn't want any toys because then he has to come to the house. I am praying for an uneventful, happy, laughter filled Christmas.
Monday, December 17, 2012
Monday, August 6, 2012
Nearing the end of summer, 8/6/2012
Hard to believe another summer is coming to an end. I usually am somewhat ready for the kids to go back to school but not yet for some reason this year. We have had a lot of fun. We started off with a trip to Isle of Palms with Taylors and Rigbys. Always a good time with all the families. We really are blessed with wonderful friends. The kids LOVED the ocean this year. We could not get them out of the water for the first time. We also got to do a wonderful boat trip for half a day. We had a boat with a tour guide that took us on an EcoTour on the island. The kids got to see how crab traps are set for fisherman, had their own afternoon on a private island with great shelling, caught a ton of their own blue crabs, and went kayaking. The best was Daddy and Connor on the kayak and it kept tipping over. We could not stop laughing! Alec was supposed to go next and decided to skip it!
We had lots of baseball this summer with Connor and Alec. Connor had a lot of adjusting this year as it was the first year of kid pitch. Alec kept saying he can't wait to play "real baseball". Grace did several weeks of tennis and we all did lots of swimming.
We have had visits with Cynthia and her kids and Patsy, Maddie, and Nicole. Patsy's visit was full of fun stuff like Kings Island, the zoo, Zoombezi Bay, school shopping, family cookouts, and lots of hide and seek. Connor of course did his usual crying when every good visit comes to an end. He gets it from me. I always used to sit at the window and cry when people left our house after a visit. Thankfully, we are heading to Michigan this weekend to visit cousins. I am so grateful for such wonderful cousins to be such a positive influence on our kids. Matt & Chris are always an inspiration on how to be a better parent.
Daddy surprised me this summer with a weekend to Indianapolis for the Tim McGraw and Kenny Chesney concert with Jen, Shorey, and Diana. We had a great time! I still have 2 more great trips to go! Jeff and I are heading for a weekend to Baltimore for an old friend's wedding and then I am heading to Colorado for a long weekend with old high school friends. Cannot wait for both! Getting to go to Cynthia's will be great as I have not seen her new home yet. I hope all my kids have as many treasured friends as I do as they grow up. It was rough elementary and middle school years, but God took care of me in high school with Cynthia and Jenny.
A couple cute and funny things that I want to make sure I write down. As we were leaving the zoo last week, they were handing out sample cans of a new Pepsi drink. All the kids got one and when we got to the car, Kate managed to spill most of hers in the car. Connor said "well Kate is not a responsible drinker." I looked at him trying not to laugh and he said "What? All those signs say drink responsibly and she obviously cannot do that." I love these little moments when I still see some innocence in my 9 1/2 year old. My other one is last night when we were celebrating Matthew's birthday, Alec disappeared while Matthew was opening presents. He reappeared just as Matthew was finishing his last present and said, "Wait, there's one more." He had gone to the basement and found him a gift (a frisbee from the 4th of July parade) and wrapped it up for Matthew. Such a heart of gold. Grace is the same way; she spent hours working on little signs for Maddie, Cole, and Matthew to hang up at the party. These are the times when I think, I must be doing something, at least one little thing right.
We had lots of baseball this summer with Connor and Alec. Connor had a lot of adjusting this year as it was the first year of kid pitch. Alec kept saying he can't wait to play "real baseball". Grace did several weeks of tennis and we all did lots of swimming.
We have had visits with Cynthia and her kids and Patsy, Maddie, and Nicole. Patsy's visit was full of fun stuff like Kings Island, the zoo, Zoombezi Bay, school shopping, family cookouts, and lots of hide and seek. Connor of course did his usual crying when every good visit comes to an end. He gets it from me. I always used to sit at the window and cry when people left our house after a visit. Thankfully, we are heading to Michigan this weekend to visit cousins. I am so grateful for such wonderful cousins to be such a positive influence on our kids. Matt & Chris are always an inspiration on how to be a better parent.
Daddy surprised me this summer with a weekend to Indianapolis for the Tim McGraw and Kenny Chesney concert with Jen, Shorey, and Diana. We had a great time! I still have 2 more great trips to go! Jeff and I are heading for a weekend to Baltimore for an old friend's wedding and then I am heading to Colorado for a long weekend with old high school friends. Cannot wait for both! Getting to go to Cynthia's will be great as I have not seen her new home yet. I hope all my kids have as many treasured friends as I do as they grow up. It was rough elementary and middle school years, but God took care of me in high school with Cynthia and Jenny.
A couple cute and funny things that I want to make sure I write down. As we were leaving the zoo last week, they were handing out sample cans of a new Pepsi drink. All the kids got one and when we got to the car, Kate managed to spill most of hers in the car. Connor said "well Kate is not a responsible drinker." I looked at him trying not to laugh and he said "What? All those signs say drink responsibly and she obviously cannot do that." I love these little moments when I still see some innocence in my 9 1/2 year old. My other one is last night when we were celebrating Matthew's birthday, Alec disappeared while Matthew was opening presents. He reappeared just as Matthew was finishing his last present and said, "Wait, there's one more." He had gone to the basement and found him a gift (a frisbee from the 4th of July parade) and wrapped it up for Matthew. Such a heart of gold. Grace is the same way; she spent hours working on little signs for Maddie, Cole, and Matthew to hang up at the party. These are the times when I think, I must be doing something, at least one little thing right.
Wednesday, May 30, 2012
Another interesting week in the Andrews house. Started off at Sunday mass after communion when everyone was back in the pew but Kate. I looked at Jeff and said "Where's Kate?". He said "I thought she was with you". Our pediatrician was also sitting behind us and got the same panicked look on her face that we had. I ran out to look in the bathrooms and outside. No Kate. I go back in to the church to see if Jeff has found her. She is in the pew smiling nicely. When I asked him where she was, he said "on the altar". I gave a questioning look to Dr. Osthaus and she nodded her head "yep". This was not quite as embarrassing as the time Alec pulled the fire alarm during mass but not one of our finer moments.
Another fine moment for me happened on Tuesday evening. My mom had helped me with the kids because I had a dentist appointment that went way longer than expected. Normally, this is not a problem for her. But there was added craziness of trying to shuttle my dad and the kids to the Memorial Tournament. So, when I picked them up, I made a quick escape with the kids and took Charlie with me. Charlie wanted to come back to our house and then when Jen came to pick him up he wanted to stay longer while she ran an errand. During that long hour, Charlie had a bathroom break in the woods and used his hands to clean up. Alec informs me of this as I am trying to console Charlie after I found him on the corner of our street sobbing (while at the same time putting his hands in his mouth). Some girl walking by had found him out there by himself and was trying to help him. He was probably out of my sight for a minute or two but it was long enough. I felt horrible!!! He was sooo tired and upset that he had "forgotten" that he wanted to go with his mom. "Aunt of the year" is going to be right up there with my award for "Mom of the year"!
Tonight, Connor came running inside from the backyard to tell me that he just saw Grandpa in Tyler's yard. He said he was floating up with the pine trees in a white robe. He was most worked up about it. My only history with people seeing dead people is when my mom and aunts have seen deceased family members right before someone in our family dies. So, I was naturally a little freaked out about this. A couple weeks ago, Kate also went into great detail about how Grandpa came to visit her and gave her a hug. She described him in pretty accurate detail. Amazing to me! I hope it just means that Bob is watching over our kids at all times!
Another fine moment for me happened on Tuesday evening. My mom had helped me with the kids because I had a dentist appointment that went way longer than expected. Normally, this is not a problem for her. But there was added craziness of trying to shuttle my dad and the kids to the Memorial Tournament. So, when I picked them up, I made a quick escape with the kids and took Charlie with me. Charlie wanted to come back to our house and then when Jen came to pick him up he wanted to stay longer while she ran an errand. During that long hour, Charlie had a bathroom break in the woods and used his hands to clean up. Alec informs me of this as I am trying to console Charlie after I found him on the corner of our street sobbing (while at the same time putting his hands in his mouth). Some girl walking by had found him out there by himself and was trying to help him. He was probably out of my sight for a minute or two but it was long enough. I felt horrible!!! He was sooo tired and upset that he had "forgotten" that he wanted to go with his mom. "Aunt of the year" is going to be right up there with my award for "Mom of the year"!
Tonight, Connor came running inside from the backyard to tell me that he just saw Grandpa in Tyler's yard. He said he was floating up with the pine trees in a white robe. He was most worked up about it. My only history with people seeing dead people is when my mom and aunts have seen deceased family members right before someone in our family dies. So, I was naturally a little freaked out about this. A couple weeks ago, Kate also went into great detail about how Grandpa came to visit her and gave her a hug. She described him in pretty accurate detail. Amazing to me! I hope it just means that Bob is watching over our kids at all times!
Monday, May 14, 2012
May 14, 2012
What a wonderfully, crazy, hectic day Mother's Day was yesterday. I had a great start to the day with getting to sleep in and breakfast in bed. Connor had presents wrapped and breakfast made when Jeff got downstairs. Despite some behavior challenges we are having lately with him, he is really such a good boy. I think he is just feeling his oats and we have to stand firm now. We had a busy day with lacrosse, flag football, and finished it off with a great family cookout at our house. Pam & Kurt, Boggess family, Tice family, and all the Buckles were here. After all the ladies ended up cleaning the kitchen, we determined that we are going to go out to dinner by ourselves next year :)
Tonight, we had a dramatic finish to our uneventful day. Kate started us off by singing "I got the moves like Jagger" while putting a stick on earring up her nose. I don't think she will try this again as she was most upset with me trying to get it out! Connor & Grace finished us off by marking in their yearbook. They were putting "X's" and devil horns on people they didn't think were "awesome". Why is Jeff never home when this stuff happens? He tends to be a little calmer than me with things. By the end of the day, I am typically spent. I lost my voice yesterday which is very frustrating when you are trying to yell at your kids. This has happened several times this year and I am starting to think God is trying to tell me something by taking my voice away. Maybe I need to learn how to use it a little better! Connor ended up being "ashamed of himself" as he told me. I tried to explain to them that I don't expect them to like everyone but I do expect them to treat everyone with respect. When I added that I don't expect them to be perfect, Connor added on that they just discussed this at CCD. "God only made 2 people perfect, Mary and Jesus, he goes on to tell me. So, I am not going to be perfect mom". Glad to see he is paying attention during the religious ed that I frequently complain about the cost of (with other adults and not the kids of course). I must say that there are times when we are trying to teach our kids these things, that I feel like a hypocrit because I am not good at always doing these things myself. It really would be great if some fabulous parenting coach would develop an app where we could just go for a quick answer on how to handle different situations with our kids!
Tonight, we had a dramatic finish to our uneventful day. Kate started us off by singing "I got the moves like Jagger" while putting a stick on earring up her nose. I don't think she will try this again as she was most upset with me trying to get it out! Connor & Grace finished us off by marking in their yearbook. They were putting "X's" and devil horns on people they didn't think were "awesome". Why is Jeff never home when this stuff happens? He tends to be a little calmer than me with things. By the end of the day, I am typically spent. I lost my voice yesterday which is very frustrating when you are trying to yell at your kids. This has happened several times this year and I am starting to think God is trying to tell me something by taking my voice away. Maybe I need to learn how to use it a little better! Connor ended up being "ashamed of himself" as he told me. I tried to explain to them that I don't expect them to like everyone but I do expect them to treat everyone with respect. When I added that I don't expect them to be perfect, Connor added on that they just discussed this at CCD. "God only made 2 people perfect, Mary and Jesus, he goes on to tell me. So, I am not going to be perfect mom". Glad to see he is paying attention during the religious ed that I frequently complain about the cost of (with other adults and not the kids of course). I must say that there are times when we are trying to teach our kids these things, that I feel like a hypocrit because I am not good at always doing these things myself. It really would be great if some fabulous parenting coach would develop an app where we could just go for a quick answer on how to handle different situations with our kids!
Friday, May 4, 2012
The week of April 30, 2012
My first post. Not sure how often I will actually have time to do this but hoping I might capture some memories for my children to someday treasure. My wonderful mom convinced me to try it as there always seems to be something happening in our house. I am a mom of four wonderful children and married to a great guy who currently happens to travel a lot for work so a lot falls on me during the week. Seeing how I was told I would not be able to have children, I try to remind myself to cherish every little, precious moment. This week seemed particularly crazy. Started off with Coming downstairs Tuesday morning to discover Kate had made herself a cup of coffee in the Keurig! That day became a grumpy one for me as I had been up most of the night with grace. She was in terrible pain from her tonsillectomy. By the end of the day, I knew I had not been a good mommy when my sweet daughter wrote me a note telling me that she was sorry I had such a bad day and she hoped it wasn't her fault. But "tomorrow would be a better day" she told me. This little girl of mine is sooo wise beyond her 7 years. This week I did however, get to spend a day with my hubby just the 2 of us. While the circumstances were not ideal as we were heading to a funeral ( my sister-in-law chris's mom). We haven't had a long car ride without whining, crying, screaming, vomiting, snoring, etc for a long time! While we were gone, my mom had the kids. She had to manage a basketball game that had gotten out of hand with Connor, Alec, and neighbor boys. Kate disappeared on her and gave herself a shower. Abby jumped on the counter and devoured 3 whole bone-IN RAW chicken breasts so there went most of dinner. Needless to say, I think my mom was glad I had arranged for a babysitter to take over at 7:30! I am so blessed to have this amazing mom! I pray everyday that she is with us for a very long time. Not only would I be lost without her but so would my kids. Thursday was a somewhat normal day of PTO meeting, mowing the lawn, laundry, and what was an attempt to trim Kate's hair. God forbid I should spend $10 to take her somewhere! My cut looks amazing compared to the cut she decided to give herself when I left the bathroom for maybe 15 seconds! She is a handful in her terrocious threes but we love her to pieces. When our neighbor came to pick up his kids tonight (we had been watching them) Kate informed him that she sleeps with her mommy and daddy every night. And that she does! We have a midnight visitor every night and know that in 10-15 years we will be begging for those snuggles again! Connor was the same way and even now at 9 I want those "midnight sneaks" back. Today, Jeff bought him his first cup for baseball. He came to me and asked "does this looks like it fits right mom?". I said "that is definitely a Daddy question". He then went on to ask me why his "thing sticks out so far and is hard in these boxer cup briefs". Again, a "daddy question". Despite what he thinks, I canNOT do it all. So, just another blessed week in the Andrews household. Thankfully, my little Alec was quiet and even keel this week! I love his little face!
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